The #1 Thing You Need to Stop in Order to Be Successful

by Kelly Lynn Adams

This past week, as I was coaching a few clients the same topic kept appearing throughout each and every conversation.

Every client I spoke with was beyond smart, dedicated, passionate, aware, hardworking and successful. It seemed like they had it all; yet there was one thing that kept holding them back in business and in life.

This same topic is all too familiar to me because there have been many times that I have been guilty of possessing this trait. However, the minute I see it pop it’s ugly little head, I recognize it, I become aware and immediately shift my mindset and course correct my actions because I know if I don’t it can easily take over.

Some of us learn this trait as children (especially if you were raised by a single parent) or we can learn it when we are first becoming independent.

So what is the #1 thing you need to stop in order to be successful in business and in life?

Stop being SUPERWOMAN. This will stunt your growth and success.

Webster’s Dictionary defines a Superwoman as:

1. A woman who performs all the duties typically associated with several different full-time roles, such as wage earner, graduate student, mother, and wife.

2. A woman with more than human powers.

3. An exceptional woman; especially: a woman who succeeds in having a career and raising a family.

If you have been taking on the role of Superwoman than you have what is called The Superwoman Syndrome.

What is the SuperWoman Syndrome?

“A term used for women who try to perform all of the roles of wage earner, home maker, mother and wife. A woman tries to perform all of these roles very well. A woman who tries to juggle several full time roles.”

Today, women are more independent than ever and can truly be, do and have it all. We have come a long way throughout history. While this can be super empowering it can also create pressure for women to live up to these high standards.

“I do think women can have it all, but not all at the same time. Our life comes in segments, and we have to understand that we can have it all if we’re not trying to do it all at once.” -Madeleine Albright

Women can rule the world, but they need to rule the relationship with themselves first.

We need to stop putting others before ourselves; while this may sound selfish at first it is necessary. Because in order to take care of anyone else you need to take care of yourself first. Take note of the emergency tips given when you are on an airplane. They tell you to first put the oxygen mask on yourself first; then you proceed to help your children, family and others around you.

So how can you shift a superwoman mentality to a super abundant mentality?

1. Have More FUN. The more fun you have the more success you will have. When you relax, recharge and rest it automatically resets your mind, energy and outlook and you become uber focused. You will see…when you are in the flow of life, ideas, people and events…start to find you and your creativity automatically increase. If you don’t have any “me time” scheduled, get your calendar out now and schedule “me time” for tomorrow.

2. Ask For Help & Delegate. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness is it actually a sign of strength. When you know when to ask for help and delegate things to others you are aware and honoring your boundaries. Remember leverage is a girl’s best friend. Every successful person has leveraged some aspect of their life and/or business in order to get more done in less time.

3. Say NO more often. Some of us have heard “say YES to everything because you never know where a YES can lead you to”. What saying NO more often does is create and honor your boundaries. You can always go back and say YES if you regret saying NO initially and if the opportunity is not available at that time then it wasn’t meant for you. Try saying NO at least once this week and see how it feels. Being protective of your energy and time is one of the most important decisions you can ever make.

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